Overcoming the Fear of Not Being Accepted
I’ll never forget the time my kindergarten teacher looked at me and said “Chanee, not everyone is going to like you.” My six year old brain registered that as “It’s my job to make everyone like me” and thus began the conditioning process of making sure I was always accepted. This core wound shows up in EVERYTHING and can greatly impact us living to our full potential. In this episode, I’m addressing this fear of not being accepted and how we can work to heal and grow from it.
Why This Conditioning Is Detrimental to Our Self-Growth
What ultimately happens is that this shows up as being a people pleaser, lack of boundaries, or codependency. This causes us to be farther away from our true and authentic selves. We naturally want to feel seen and heard. It shows up with so many of my clients and people I interact with on a daily basis.
How This Shows Up In Our Business/life and Our Ability To Be Seen
In Your Business
You want to help people and when you have this wound, you don’t allow people to actually see you. What this looks like is that you are watering down your content and it takes a lot of energy to be constantly worried about what people will think. It allows for a lot of fear to be in the driver’s seat of your business.
In Your Life
The best way to figure out if this is showing up in your life, you will feel unfulfilled and inauthentic. If you feel like people just don’t get you, it’s because you’re worried that people won’t accept you as you are. The only way to heal this wound is to take personal responsibility. Are you abandoning yourself just to be accepted by others? This is also one of the biggest indicators that this is a wound for you.
Healing This Core Wound
The best way to heal this core wound is through unlearning. Unlearning is the process through which we break down the origins of our thoughts, beliefs, emotions. You are not broken- we don’t need to fix, just heal the wound. I want you to take a minute and do a self evaluation.
Self-Evaluation
With this, take what you like, let the rest go. You want to strip away all that you think you should be to make room for what is. This is the main purpose for self-evaluation.
3 Steps to Overcoming The Fear of Not Being Accepted And Showing Up As Your Authentic Self
You are going to create a Thought Model- What are the current subconscious thoughts that are driving my results?
You need to now write a new conscious thought model- What are the new thoughts and feelings I get to embody?
Join a community that supports you- you need a place to practice and where you are embraced for your wholeness
